These are totally late, but I don’t have much to add. If you haven’t listened to episodes 3 & 4 of the podcast, you can check them out here on iTunes, GooglePlay, Stitcher, and Spotify.
While episode three rounded out the story of how Gaspare and I met, episode four got pretty intense as we started to look into some of our negative core belief structures. Chantalle takes you on a journey to identify your core beliefs by looking back into subconscious thoughts and memories.
If you struggle with depression, anxiety, or low self-esteem, listen to episode four of the podcast and take a look at this worksheet that will help you chronicle and begin to challenge some of your beliefs.
Books that I can recommend for dealing with depression and anxiety include:
Mind Over Mood – This is a workbook as well, and I just started going through it. It’s geared mostly towards those who suffer with depression, but it’s a really great course that focuses on positive core beliefs and being mindful of how we structure our criticism.
Also, don’t forget to watch this excellent Tedtalk by Bruné Brown about the importance of vulnerability in our lives, and how sharing our feelings is a strength rather then a weakness.
Gaspare lived in the solarium of his old apartment. This is what a Solarium looks like, for those who aren’t in the know. I think it’s a bit of an old-fashioned word. Either that or I just prefer balconies.
This is the wine with the glass cork that Gaspare and I drank the night we… well, you know ^_~!
Are you a Serial Monogamist? Some of these points come across as a little negative, but believe it or not, Cosmopolitan has a pretty decent list here. Granted, Gaspare and I still check out other men and women and then talk about how hot they were, because we’re THAT couple.
(Gaspare would also like to point out that I sometimes text him pictures of hot, half-naked models while he’s at work. Mostly because it’s funny.)
Consent – Yes means yes, no means no, and every response must be respected. If you had any questions surrounding the idea of consent, please check out THIS resource from the Anti-Violence Project where they go into a decent amount of detail regarding what constitutes consent.
Haven’t caught up? Listen right here! Or click to subscribe to us on iTunes, Stitcher, or Google Play.
In this episode, Gaspare and I recount how it all started five years ago, when he and I met and fell in love under romantic, and less than optimal circumstances.
Starting our podcast off in this style is inspired by Kevin Smith‘s Podcast “Jay & Silent Bob Get Old”, Which if you haven’t sat down and listened to at least the first 10 episodes, you should really do, because you will immediately want Kevin Smith to be your best friend.
We thought it was important to start off talking about our relationship for a couple of different reasons. For one, our relationship is something we’ve worked really hard at – you’ll soon see why in subsequent episodes (Sorry for leaving things on a cliffhanger ^_~!). Secondly, we think it’s super important that you set off down this path of self-discovery by examining your closest relationships, and that’s what “Reflectionships” is all about.
The song used in the intro was Chill Day by Lakey Inspired. Check him out on Soundcloud by clicking HERE.
I mentioned that Gaspare and I ate Filipino Eggrolls that my aunt made for my cousin’s birthday. They’re called ‘Lumpia Shanghai’, and if you want to make them for yourself, one of my favourite YouTubers (EmmymadeinJapan) has an excellent video HERE on how to make them.
For those interested parties, I’m quite sure the ‘adult film’ that Gaspare and I accidentally watched with his mother in the hotel room was 1973’s Story of a Cloistered Nun. It is available for your ironic pleasure HERE.
The Hotel we stayed at in Niagara was the Americana Conference Resort Spa & Waterpark. It does not come recommended, unless you’re looking for an ironic place to shoot your indie film.
The Italian Restaurant that we ate at in Niagara Falls was Antica Pizzeria & Ristorante. I believe they have a wood-fire oven, and their dough is a pretty traditional Neapolitan. Recommended.
Furthermore, we briefly talked about ‘arancini’ or rice balls in the podcast. This is a pretty decent recreation of a Sicilian recipe, presented by a little English guy in a strange chef’s smock. I really can’t recommend these enough. Click HERE to commence mouth-watering.
Advice and Tips from this Episode
The biggest tip we had to share in this episode when it comes to launching yourself into relationships is to step outside your comfort zone. Literally EVERYONE who has any experience with relationships will tell you that this is one of the steps to putting yourself out there, but let me expand on this point.
For me, travel plans (AKA, going anywhere more than an hour away from home) usually requires a week’s worth of planning. I am just NOT the kind of person who goes on a road trip of more than a few hours without knowing exactly where I’ll be going or stopping along the way. When I drove to California seven years ago, I knew exactly where I was going to be staying, and called my family from my designated hotels every single night. So, deciding to go to Niagara Falls with Gaspare and his family was very much against my general level of comfort.
Getting outside of your comfort zone means doing something that might feel wrong. A good thing to remember (or to clarify) is that so long as no one is getting hurt, or you’re not putting yourself in harm’s way, it’s general safe to go for it, even if it makes you a little queasy.